Timeline of my crushes

Perhaps, it's weird, but when I look back at my growth from girl to woman, I remember all those defining moments. Like learning how to ride a bike and spell the word "Mississippi." Or how about when I figured out how to rollerblade and more importantly how to brake!

But also an important day... When I first realized boys were cute, and subsequently when I realized that the very cutest and most desirable boys weren't the snot-nosed dorks on the playground but the fantastic heroes of Hollywood. Here's a look back and some of the favorites who made my heart melt:

8-13 years old: Harrison Ford. Either Han Solo or Indiana Jones-- didn't matter. He was my guy. Perfect for a young girl who wanted adventure. This guy could look handsome in everything from 1930's garb to space suits.

13-14 years old: Leonardo DiCaprio (circa Titanic-- yeah I'm "that" girl. 'I'll never let go' -- His posters were all over my bedroom. I admit it).

14-16: Joshua Jackson- aka Pacey, from Dawson's Creek. Really sweet and goofy and he just needed a nice girl to give some confidence. Plus he was slightly more attainable than Harrison or Leonardo. (yes I'm on a first name basis with these guys, what's your point?)

17-19 Orlando Bloom (Lord of the Rings, Pirates of the Caribbean)--- don't know how to explain this one-- elves turn me on? But the swashbuckling, handsome pirate-- please, that's a no-brainer-- huh, on that note, Johnny Depp wasn't bad in that movie either. Damn Kierra Knightly!

Currently (see above picture):
Joaquin Phoenix: It's that brooding look combined with deadpan humor-- watch the movie "signs" for examples-- "This crop stuff is just about a bunch of nerds who never had a girlfriend their whole lives. They're like thirty now. They make up secret codes and analyze Greek mythology and make secret societies where other guys who never had girlfriends can join in. They do stupid crap like this to feel special. It's a scam. Nerds were doin' it twenty five years ago and new nerds are doing it again."

Christopher Meloni -- Law & Order SVU. *drool* He's rugged and tough. Sometimes even emotionally unavailable which of course makes him seem even more mysterious and brooding. In SVU, he's got these personal demons that drive him and he's always shoving child molesters around and getting in trouble with the captain. Grr-- I love bad boys who are really good guys! The muscles don't hurt either.

Now, some might argue that having crushes on unattainable men is sad. I say- no! It's no more sad than half my male friends lusting after Jessica Alba (what heterosexual man doesn’t do that?).

True, I'll never meet, date or get to know any of these men but I like it that way. For all I know they're just more warped Hollywood people. My Midwest style of living would not jive with their need to surgically enhance all my features.

The important thing is the crushes are healthy and I have at no time, sent them my cell phone number … cause that would just be sad… and wrong… seriously. What are you looking at? I'm NORMAL :)